And Baby Makes Three

The Family Chatmon was established and Bill and Miriam lived as the hynm writer, John W. Peterson expressed it, “Each for the other and both for the Lord.”  This motto was lived out in ways that will only be recorded in the annals of Heaven, and I promised Daddy that I would keep it that way.  I do hope that he will forgive me  if along the way I share few choice morsels to add to humor and enjoyment to make you appreciate what incredible parents and Christians they were.   The Lord blessed them with a baby girl by the name of Catherine Lynn (Cathie, Catie or variety of nicknames) within a year of their marriage. She was early, and time would reveal several medical challenges.  The earliest was hip dysplasia a struggle for parents and daughter with the brace she was expected to wear. But there was an unwavering trust in God on the part of the parents, although I am certain there may been honest questions and even tears, but God understands, Baby Catherine went to Church for the first time before she was 3 weeks old. The Christian and Missionary Alliance does not practice pedobaptism. They believe that baptism is a privilege reserved for those are old enough to have consciously placed their faith in Christ as Savior.  Instead, they practice infant dedication where the parents stand before the Lord and the local assembly and pledge to bring their child up in manner that glorifies the Lord. Bill and Miriam stood with Baby Catherine on a fall Sunday in 1958 before the membership of First Alliance church and Pastor Homer Klinsing and said another I do … this one with a much deeper commitment  because another life was at stake.   Now they looked to the future trusting God … No one knew what it held for any of them.

 

 

 

Courtship and Marriage

It was definitely a match made in Heaven. Mom and Daddy continued to bond as they planned activities for the young singles.  Their first real date was attending the missionary rally in Charlotte at the C&MA Council.  He took her to lunch and she ordered a fruit salad.  Unfortunately, it did not live up to their expectations, because upon finishing, it she saw small lettuce worm crawl across her plate. Without making a fuss, Daddy simply inquired of the server if they charged extra for the meat.  They did not … Mom’s meal was free. Such was their first date.   I believe Grandma fell instantly in love with Daddy; he seemed to blend right  in the Alspaugh clan.  In fact he seemed to have a special attachment  for my Uncle Leroy who was in the advanced stages of Crohns disease and had moved back home after a failed marriage. A trip to Mayo clinic had  proved to be of no avail. A rude nurse at a local hospital informed Grandma that Leroy was just a big baby. After Leroy’s death, Daddy who always championed the cause of the underdog sought the nurse out, and said,  “Remember that big baby that wad here last month?  Well, we buried him last week.”  By this time Bill and Miriam were engaged.  Because of the funeral and due to the fact two younger sisters married that same year,   Bill and Miriam chose to keep their wedding simple. They even selected Christmas day when most of the family would already be present. Bill broke all wedding protocol by joining the family for Christmas dinner and then he and Miriam went to check on the church, which was already decorated for Christmas, and so the Family Chatom was established on December 25, 1957.  The Reverend Homer Klinsing officiated.  The special music offered was “Savior like a Shepherd Lead Us.” And so He did for 43 years of marriage. The adventure was just beginning. They took a brief honeymoon to Williamsburg/Jamestown, VA which they culminated by surprising the Acklands at the train station in Roanoke, VA , Then they returned home to Winston-Salem to a small yellow rental house on Salt St at the edge of Old Salem. Life was just beginning.

The Saga Continues

And so the two young lovers  met.  However, let us backtrack a little. James, or so he  was called by some , had been reared in West Salem, most likely on the edge of what most  would the secular side, known as Winston.  I am uncertain as to when the two merged. Although, his parents were decidedly unreligious, they paid a neighbor girl a quarter a week to take to take him to Sunday school at a local Moravian church. There he found his first encounter with spiritual teaching and remembered it fondly. There has been some confusion surrounding my dad’s name. Some would attribute to female stubbornness. His mother wanted to name him for his father, but my grandfather objected vehemently, fearing that Daddy would forever be labeled, “Junior.” Nana’s response to that reasoning, was, “Well name him what you want, but I’m to call him Bill.”  After trusting Christ as his Savior at the YFC meeting, Daddy attended Salem Baptist for a while.  There he met and was mentored by a retired missionary couple, Harry and Maude Ackland, who would become Auntie Maude and Uncle Harry to our family.  Auntie Maud had been reared in Eastern Canada and was from an unsaved family of some means.  Uncle Harry  was from Wales and had been saved in the Welsh revival. They spent a number of years in one of the African countries in extremely primitive conditions reaching the lost. When Daddy met them, they became his spiritual parents. It  was during these years that his heart turned to thoughts of  love  and these thoughts led to a failed romance … but God’s ways are higher. He had been attending her church.  And so when the romance failed, his cousin, a new believer,  invited him to that small Alliance Church where he met Miriam, a nurse he  had only seen in passing.  They established a relationship … now it was God’s time. He had known various members of her family.  He know there to support them through the death of Miriam’s brother, Leroy.  Soon it was time to tie the knot. Some wondered.  Miriam was the missionary in training now that nursing school was over … Bill was derailing God’s plans, but God is sovereign, and two hearts yielded to Him cannot undo His purpose regardless of how others read the signs.  God had a higher plan than the mission field for either of them.  One term was certainly have put Miriam in her grave if she had been able to pass the rigorous  physical that CMA expected its missionaries to endure this side of the field.  God’s ways were so much higher even though initially the young lover did not appear to meet human expectations.   Life is a journey that is best undertaken when we live for an audience of One.

 

Humble Beginnings

Few people can say that they have lived for most of their lives within a 10-mile radius of where they were born. This is true of me with the exception of two brief sojourns to college, which lasted anywhere from two weeks to three months. While it was somewhat limiting, it should have given me a since of stability and security, but security is not found in sameness, it found in the One who never changes.  I presently live less than a block from where my Dad grew up and about a mile from where Mom spent her childhood. They hailed from vastly different families.   Mom grew up in a family where Christ was honored, but Dad grew up in a family where He did not found a place.  Dad eventually trusted the Lord as savior at a YFC rally in the 1940’s and Mom although having the name of Jesus on her lips from early childhood,  received assurance of her salvation in as similar setting as few years later.  The Lord brought the two of them together when they met in a tiny Christian and Missionary Alliance Church in Winston-Salem. Mom had wanted to be a missionary, but she had barely passed nurse’s training due to a congenital heart condition and childhood struggle with rheumatic fever.  Their lives demonstrated through the years that God’s ways are indeed higher than ours are, and it is in our best interest to follow Him.  Those years before they met were full of growing up. Life was a vastly different for a family of 10 children and family of one child.  Mom was the third from the youngest … Miriam.   They lived where they could have chickens, but I think the favored pet was a duck named Herman who came squawking every time the chickens got  into the neighbor’s fishpond, which was a fairly frequent occurrence.  Love surrounded the family. Good food somehow abounded for the family …my how Grandma could cook!  Even when her children had children, we all had to come back for Sunday dinner. It was her way of saying,” I love you”.  My dad often joked that he married my mom just to get into the family.  I think it was his first taste of real love. Mom and Jesus began to teach him what love was and how to love other people. When you grow up without love, it is hard to begin to give it.  Neither of my parents grew up in homes that were outwardly demonstrative.  Mom’s parents had all they could do to keep 10 kids fed, clothed and spiritually sane. Dad’s home was too dysfunctional and full of pain. I believe the only love he experienced was from the numerous dogs he owned.  The greatest joys of his childhood were the relationships he fostered with elderly in the community and those crazy dogs. A lonely little boy … a girl with a heart condition that no one expects to live long into adulthood.  Yet Jesus steps on the scene and all is changed. I have heard it said,  and I will reiterate throughout this memoir that nothing is lost in the hands of the Redeemer.